Loss of a Loved One

On Friday afternoon my dad's wife took her last breath and slipped away. While this wasn't a complete shock, it had only been a few weeks since she was diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer that had metastasized to her bones. It started a few months ago when the doctors wrote off her cough as pneumonia and gave her recurring treatments with antibiotics. It wasn't pneumonia and the cancer spread rapidly and within a few weeks she was suffering from intolerable back pain which turned out to have been caused by a broken hip bone, which is how they discovered the cancer. A biopsy and multiple blood tests later showed that it was advanced lung cancer.

Barbara and I had an interesting and special relationship. Our relationship started off terribly, to say the least - hate at first sight. Over time, we've learned to get along and the distance between us has done wonderful things for our relationship. She makes my dad happy and that's what's important to me, and over time I have learned to appreciate and even love her.

My dad lives across the ocean, so we don't get to see much of each other, but I know how much he loved her and how much he'll miss her. We've been talking on the phone daily these past few weeks. He sounds distanced from her death, like he's already begun saying goodbye when she slipped into a coma a few days prior to her death. He's always been a very reasonable man, strong in his beliefs. I wish I could be there to hug him. It's these times when you need to be surrounded by loved ones.

I never really kept in touch with my step-siblings, with there being an ocean between us and all. A few days before Barbara passed away, she and I spoke on the phone. She was sad, realizing how fast everything was slipping away. She asked me to look over Jessica, her daughter. I  promised I would. I've been talking to Jessica quite a lot these past few days, making sure she's ok, dealing with her grief and mourning her mom in a way that suits her. I believe in the importance of a promise and I never make a promise I don't plan on keeping, and this promise is no exception. Jessica may have lost a mother, and while nothing can ever replace that, I hope that I can finally be the sister she never had.